You're wrong... you're DED wrong! (the sequel)

Back by popular (Poti's) demand:

Chuck Norris doesn't play God. Playing is for children.

For Chuck Norris, every street is "one way." His way.

Chuck Norris has to use a stunt double when he does crying scenes.

There is no Control button on Chuck Norris' computer. Chuck Norris is always in control.

Chuck Norris make onions cry.

If at first you don't succeed, you're not Chuck Norris.

Behind every successful man, there is a woman. Behind every dead man, there is Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because Chuck Norris only recognizes the element of surprise.

Chuck Norris does not play the lottery. It doesn't have nearly enough balls.

Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.

Everybody loves Raymond. Except Chuck Norris.

When chuck Norris does division, there are no remainders.

Chuck Norris never wet his bed as a child. The bed wet itself out of fear.

When Chuck Norris talks, everybody listens. And dies.

The quickest way to a man's heart is with Chuck Norris' fist.

Chuck Norris doesn't throw up if he drinks too much. Chuck Norris throws down! Nigga.

It takes Chuck Norris 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes.

Some people wear Superman pajamas. Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas.

Time waits for no man. Unless that man is Chuck Norris.